Your Struggles Are The Call Of Your Soul

Posted on December 31, 2015 by Joanna

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Today is a poignant day where my heart and my soul intersect with my karma and my destiny.

Twenty years ago when I was 23, I stood at the top of Union Street in San Francisco and looked down the hill at the bustling street and felt intuitively that my dream of opening a soulful psychotherapy practice would happen right down the little hill.

Bright eyed and bushy tailed, I knew I had tremendous work to do – very well aware of the rigors of licensure; 3000 hours of unpaid clinical hours, establishing a practice that would be sustainable, and staying devoted to maintaining my self care, professional and personal development, and most importantly my self-love.

Having had the good fortune to have intersected with a very pessimistic and newly licensed person who warned me that there were “no clients out there,” I decided very consciously not to populate my precious and vulnerable heart and mindset real esate with such gloomy stories. It simply just was not going to be an option.

In a city with neighborhood districts in the Marina nicknamed Couch Hollow (for Cow Hollow) and Therapist Row on Sacramento Street, apparently almost private practices closed (80%) within two years. Whoa!

Within two years I was well on my way to making six figures, working about 15 to 20 hours a week, doing work I absolutely loved. I treasured the sacred opportunity to work with people all trying to find their way back home to their clear bodies, open minds, loving hearts, and aligned souls.

I spent all my extra money either paying back my student loans, or investing in new courses and classes to give me extra training. I was delighted. I had fun. I grew and deepened. I loved my friends and partners deeply and transformed so much darkness back to love, awareness, presence, compassion, delight, and creativity.

And over time – I began to relax into the work. I think that was at about the ten year mark, the numbers of years they say it takes to make a really good clinician. I’d found my voice. And a way to offer a creative, integrated healing mandala to the multi faceted clients I seemed to attract. Soulful, big hearts, big pains, and big karmas. They had big desires and dreams, and big gifts. I was challenged and pushed to the edge of my limitations of experience and training, always seeking to expand to serve better.

It’s been amazing. And in that amazement my soul called out to serve larger, wider, farther.

So I’ve been learning to take my work out to the larger world and open to everything that brings up – new initiatory self experiences all over again that will allow me to be of service

As I sit here today I am super grateful for all my experiences on Union Street.

I stood at the top of the hill this morning, the same spot I stood at age 23, where my car happened to find it’s resting spot at the top of the hill. And as I looked down, I cried. Both for the journey I have taken and the call of now that’s leading me forward.

Thank you Union Street for all the delights and the opportunities to grow.

I like this phrase, “”same spiral, different octave”.

Same spiral of being of service, but different octave of a whole other integrated leg of the journey.

I’ll maintain some of the wisdom from that 23 year old, for all of her challenges and shortcomings she had some good mojo.

I hear her. I simply don’t allow highest success and evolution for all NOT to be an option – no matter what people say.

I will continue healthy self love.

I embrace all the learning opportunities and challenges that come my way because I know they are the call of my soul coming to bring me home.

 

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